My New Moleskine Notebook

Chum, you and me are going to blow the face off people’s faces. Years from now, creepy old historians will open you with trembling fingers, hardly daring to gaze upon the treasures inside. Your blank canvas—so achingly virginal!—will soon be filled with the seed of my genius in a non-gross way.

Sketches of people across from me on the subway, perfectly capturing their sad, broken lives. Poems about the girl at the bookstore who sold me to you, whose mellifluous words thanks next hinted at the arousal she could barely contain. Short, minimalist stories about writers riding the subway. Thoughts, feelings, impressions. Dreams. Um. Phone numbers. Maybe some 3-D boxes. My signature a lot of times. I could draw the Slayer logo, I’m pretty good at that. Pictures of boobs. Oh! That reminds me, I need that ointment for my nipples and some dishwasher detergent, let me jot that down before I forget. I am such an airhead sometimes, notebook! Oh, notebook. It’s gonna be different this time. I will definitely not only use you when I need to write down Call of Duty cheat codes. Not exclusively, I’m sure. I’m positive.

» Rating: SEVEN SEXY LADIES